30 days

I had started reading David Allen's Getting Things Done last month, 15th February. I remember the date so vividly because he said that in the next 30 days something will surely come and surprise you. "Life is always full of it! No matter what you are doing", he said.

I found the thought very intriguing. I marked 15th March on my calendar and wrote 'Did something interesting happen in the last 30 days?'. The message popped up on my phone last night. And guess what, something did happen! Not just one thing, a couple of things even happened. Things that mean a lot to me right now!

Life is really full of surprises. Its never going to be boring. And then again its what you make out of it. In perspective, I think I would have found something that happened and ranked it down on the list of surprises. It need not be a great milestone in my journey. It could have just been a sweet little surprise.

Its always about how you see it. I see it being fine. I see it going good. I see it with me and a smile.

Books - how they keep me going..

I have always loved books. The smell, the touch of pages. The excitement in turning pages to find out more. Ever since I can remember, I have enjoyed one. Thanks to mom mostly always took a book before going to bed. I used to follow her lead and read. And thanks to dad who never refused anything to do with a book. Both of them stock up books like crazy so much so that our house has two walls of books. You can imagine growing up in such a place.

The love was for a long time only around fiction. A trip to the library every two weeks. A 20 minutes session of high. Its always amazing to enter the worlds of the characters. It is exciting to look at things from their eyes, to know what they are thinking. Mostly to just knowing so much about a scene. In real life, its never like that. We are always looking at things from our perspective and only see as much as the eye can reach. This bubble is broken in fiction and the horizon spreads around a couple of people. Sometimes I wish how it would be if that were to happen for real!

A recent love has been self-help books. They have come to be an interesting foray. I call it foray because I never believed in them. I thought I dint need them. And what can beat fiction? Until a friend rather pushed me into it! I could not be more grateful. I have to come to love them and the amount of knowledge I get from them.

The little things about my actions, more awareness around, more observation, more calmness, more thinking before saying, less fights, less uncalled-for-arguments, more confidence and more hope.

It is doing wonders! I know it will continue to. Its truly taken a place close to heart.

PS: DREAMING of the day I get my own wall of books!

Infinite Happiness

Nothing is better than infinite happiness.
A piece of chocolate is better than nothing.

So wait.. a piece of chocolate is better than infinite happiness!

What are you waiting for? Go have a piece of chocolate, we just found its better than infinite happiness!

Lol-read of the day :) Just reading this gave me a shot of happiness, moments back!

Selfless giving

We all know a mother's selfless giving! Some of us are lucky enough to experience it everyday.

It has been a season of sharing among close friends with first salaries and valentines. One close friend took up an idea of buying us gifts from her first salary! And she has been genuinely selfless about it. It sparked a sense of giving in the gang. We were speaking about it earlier in the day. It got me thinking about being selfless.

I wrote to some close friends and family in the last month. I did not expect a note in return. One doesn't have to write a note to return the love. They would do it in their own way. Aside that, I thought it was a wonderful feeling being selfless.

Right at this moment, the illusion of selfless breaks! I am not being selfless, in my head I am still selfish for their love.

In some twisted indirect way we end up being selfish. I am also referring to selfish for a good cause! You want your family/city/country to be better and that would account for selfishness as well.

As long as it means well I guess :)

“Your conscience is the measure of the honesty of your selfishness. 

Listen to it carefully.” ― Richard Bach

PS: The mother's love however is an exception. I believe its surely selfless!

I've learned

Reblogged from A Learning a day! A lovely note :)


I’ve learned-
that you cannot make someone love you. All you can do is be someone who can be loved. The rest is up to them.

I’ve learned-
that no matter how much I care, some people just don’t care back.

I’ve learned-
that it takes years to build up trust, and only seconds to destroy it.

I’ve learned-
that no matter how good a friend is, they’re going to hurt you every once in a while and you must forgive them for that.

I’ve learned-
that it’s not what you have in your life but who you have in your life that counts.

I’ve learned-
that you should never ruin an apology with an excuse.

I’ve learned-
that you can get by on charm for about fifteen minutes. After that, you’d better know something.

I’ve learned-
that you shouldn’t compare yourself to the best others can do.

I’ve learned-
that you can do something in an instant that will give you heartache for life.

I’ve learned-
that it’s taking me a long time to become the person I want to be.

I’ve learned-
that you should always leave loved ones with loving words. It may be the last time you see them.

I’ve learned-
that you can keep going long after you can’t.

I’ve learned-
that we are responsible for what we do, no matter how we feel.

I’ve learned-
that either you control your attitude or it controls you.

I’ve learned-
that regardless of how hot and steamy a relationship is at first, the passion fades and there had better be something else to take its place.

I’ve learned-
that heroes are the people who do what has to be done when it needs to be done, regardless of the consequences.

I’ve learned-
that money is a lousy way of keeping score.

I’ve learned-
that my best friend and I can do anything or nothing and have the best time.

I’ve learned-
that sometimes the people you expect to kick you when you’re down will be the ones to help you get back up.

I’ve learned-
that sometimes when I’m angry I have the right to be angry, but that doesn’t give me the right to be cruel.

I’ve learned-
that true friendship continues to grow, even over the longest distance. Same goes for true love.

I’ve learned-
that just because someone doesn’t love you the way you want them to doesn’t mean they don’t love you with all they have.

I’ve learned-
that maturity has more to do with what types of experiences you’ve had and what you’ve learned from them and less to do with how many birthdays you’ve celebrated.

I’ve learned-
that you should never tell a child their dreams are unlikely or outlandish. Few things are more humiliating, and what a tragedy it would be if they believed it.

I’ve learned-
that your family won’t always be there for you. It may seem funny, but people you aren’t related to can take care of you and love you and teach you to trust people again. Families aren’t biological.

I’ve learned-
that it isn’t always enough to be forgiven by others. Sometimes you are to learn to forgive yourself.

I’ve learned-
that no matter how bad your heart is broken the world doesn’t stop for your grief.

I’ve learned-
that our background and circumstances may have influenced who we are, but we are responsible for who we become.

I’ve learned-
that a rich person is not the one who has the most, but is one who needs the least.

I’ve learned-
that just because two people argue, it doesn’t mean they don’t love each other. And just because they don’t argue, it doesn’t mean they do.

I’ve learned-
that we don’t have to change friends if we understand that friends change.

I’ve learned-
that you shouldn’t be so eager to find out a secret. It could change your life forever.

I’ve learned-
that two people can look at the exact same thing and see something totally different.

I’ve learned-
that no matter how you try to protect your children, they will eventually get hurt and you will hurt in the process.

I’ve learned-
that even when you think you have no more to give, when a friend cries out to you, you will find the strength to help.

I’ve learned-
that credentials on the wall do not make you a decent human being.

I’ve learned-
that the people you care about most in life are taken from you too soon.

I’ve learned-
that it’s hard to determine where to draw the line between being nice and not hurting people’s feelings, and standing up for what you believe.

I’ve learned-
that people will forget what you said, and people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.

Unknown unknowns!

There are known knowns; there are things we know we know.
We also know there are known unknowns; that is to say we know there are some things we do not know.
But there are also unknown unknowns – there are things we do not know we don't know.

- Donald Rumsfeld

My professor quoted this wonderful saying at a soil lecture today. He used it to explain how there might be numerous factors involved in foundation design and we can only make sure we account until the known unknowns. 

It struck me how this quote applies to life in general. Our knowledge is a tiny speck in this huge universe. What we know about anything is only so much. Unknown unknowns account for everything that happens around us without our consent. Unknown unknowns are probably the dudes whom we have named destiny. Remarkable realization today. 

In such an ignorant existence, we can only aim to expand our tiny speck of knowledge! Why waste time judging others. We don't know what we don't know about the world. Well then why waste time on it. Why not make the known knowns matter! 

Love and live :)

Also reminded me of an e-mail I received once. An artist's portrayal of the same thought. Heres the painting made into a lovely video, do watch!

The hippies

I am listening to The Dewarists.

They resemble the hippies to me. A bunch of talented professionals from various strata of the music world come together in Indian cities and create awesome mind blowing compositions. Its interesting how we can create beautiful things from disconnected worlds. A deep lesson if you ask me!

One of my favourite songs Maaya by Indian Ocean and Mohit Chauhan

Joy

Joy is what happens to us when we allow ourselves to recognize how good, things really are - Marianne Williamson

Never regret anything..

..because at one point it was exactly what you wanted!

I love it. Whenever I think about choices I made and things I did, I tend to wonder if I should have done it. And especially when things go wrong after my choices I upset myself.

Not anymore. This has enlightened me enough. To make choices I 'want' to make. Everything else will fall into place. Or maybe not.

The upside is that I never have to wonder what 'could' have happened.


Will go to bed with a peaceful mind tonight! Clears up a lot of things :)

I wonder how, I wonder why

I was at clementi mall a while back. I was having lunch with a friend at Burger King. To our right, there was a 70-something couple having their meal. The woman was in a wheel chair and the man was pushing her around. They were eating fries and were sharing a drink with two straws in it.

I haven't seen something so awe and so cute and oh-god in sooo long! It made me wonder if I'd want that if I was ever in a wheel chair. I do. I am guessing almost every other person would too.

And then again I saw this video on facebook. About an excellent singer on X factor. He was a handicapped Iranian by origin, adopted by an Australian Mother. His performance was moving for many reasons. What I noticed was however, the mother - Moira Kelly. She runs Children's First Foundation in Australia. To sum it up - she has changed the lives of many kids and continues to do so.

These two encounters got me thinking about my life and what I want (Yet another time! - I do so much thinking, sometimes I forget to live it :/) Anyway, I was just contemplating. Would I give up having a regular life with a regular family to change people's lives? Can I try and manage both?

I wonder.

Can you be THE happiest person in the world?

I took my project module, without thinking one iota about it. Its a technical Elective. Which in layman's terms means, a civil subject that we chose to study out of interest, not compulsory. And on the first day of the module, the professors talked about how they expect so much out of us, I even contemplated quitting. But 4 of my close friends were doing that module, so I just decided to stick along.

We had our first presentation. We were really creative, but we missed out on content. So even-though the profs commended our performance he said he was disappointed with the bad part. We were sad. I was especially sad. When you work hard and dont get results, its disheartening.

It was time for the second presentation. We had slogged for the past two three weeks, and more so for the past few days. Day of second presentation came. Today. We suited up and left for the venue. The group before ourselves were fretting out and making us anxious. We got nervous and started freaking out a bit. But as we were waiting we gained the confidence that this time we actually hit it. We got our content and creativity on the plate. Spot on. We had nothing to worry about. We cheered ourselves up and smiled. We encouraged each other and we entered the room.

It went smooth. They loved us! All the hard work paid. Our passion showed. They were amused and content. We could just see it on their face :) And God was I glad. We all were. I was so thrilled that you actually dint need grades for this kind of a thing. This was nearer to the real world situation. A place were we need to sell ourselves and show that we have the passion and the energy to do something. What made it very special was that, today I felt like I actually belonged in NUS. For the first time in two and a half years. That means something. I never thought i'll experience that. I really never did.

We made it!

Shaniya and Priyansha! We might not be particularly thrilled about Civil most times. But we know we'll make it girls!
Sid and TzyyFung! You guys can do studies and stuff like this with passion and I am so glad I met you!

I learnt so many things from today. Just to list down:
- Give it your best shot, it'll pay someway or other!
- You work best with people you get along. If you already dont know them, get to know them. In our case, we were a bunch always so it clicked just the right way!
- Marks dont matter so much. Relax and enjoy studying. Maybe you'll actually endup liking it!
- Hardwork with passion! Always.
- First impression is the best impression. Maybe not always. But make sure you hit it the first time anyway!

To many days like this. Filled with positive energy :)

Its really about sticking with it all the way!

I have a really dabba(sad-outdated-gone) phone. And it has just one game. Quadrapop. Cats/Fishes/Crabs/Monkey/Frogs come flying from top and you need to get four of them together for them to pop. And thats about it. The highest score was by Pigs(brother) around 60k. And the maximum I got to was always 20k.

Its my favourite past time when I am on the bus or in the loo. Popping those animated things away. However, everytime I was playing I wanted to get past 20k. I always wondered how Pigs got to 60k. He was always better at games than me. But this seemed waaay pro even for him - a difference of 40k. This piece of fact was always stuck in my head when I played he game.

Today though, somehow I never once bothered to look at the score. I just kept playing, concentration completely on the game and when I looked up at the scores - VIOLA! 58k. The joyy. I worked a little bit more and neared 60k and lost the game. A little short of beating his score. Suddenly, I was pro at the game too!

Though I did not entirely win, I take the learning back. Maybe I shouldn't be so bothered about the result all the time. The process matters. Enjoy it and guess what, when you are doing your things right you'll eventually get there. For sure!

Leadership is conviction in action!

What a insightful way to put it.

I was at a leadership camp in a rain forest in Malaysia. We went through three days of intensive adventure activities and workshops, everything tied down to leadership. It was a very eye-opening experience. Its wonderful how little things that affect a small game can teach you so much about how to handle real-time situations. One of the activities was around a wooden plank built like a see-saw. So 15 people climb on top of it and try to balance the plank. We tried for 20 minutes moving from left to right and right to left. And somewhere after a hundred tries we balanced the plank for 5 seconds before we went to square one. It was all about how you work with each other and understand the situation. Its all about how you make use of the team members. Its all about how you satisfy each team members goal while satisfying the teams goal. Its about how you encourage people. Its about how you inspire them. Its about being true to yourself and to your commitment.

And like Prof.Tan Teck Koon put it, Its about conviction in action.

Room with a love

I entered my room just now. My bed was neatly done. The cluttered and clutter-free zones on my table look organised in its own way. My shelves are pretty neat too. After a weird night, and some thinking, it is relaxing to see my room. The relaxing room freshener. Things which I wrote to inspire myself. Tamil/Sanskrit prayers in english (fail). Even though I miss the PGP room's coziness, I must say the blinds in Temasek are actually creating a wonderful depth to the room. Looking at the ridiculous picture Pigs framed for me makes me smile and miss him, yet thankful. The candle reminds me of power-cuts at home and how he would want to pee at that exact same instant. I looked at all the people on my wall, people who have meant something, people who mean something, and will for quite a while, people who will always be there, people who make my day, people who make me laugh, people I love. They look down upon my clean room and asked me to smile. There is something in the space that holds some love and feeds my heart every now and then.

I derive my energy from my environment. Thats why I love walking down a green lane. And thats why I am glad my room makes me happy. 

After a while..

After a while you learn
The subtle difference between
Holding a hand and chaining a soul
And you learn that love doesn't mean leaning
And company doesn't always mean security.

And you begin to learn
That kisses aren't contracts
And presents aren't promises
And you begin to accept your defeats
With your head up and your eyes ahead
With the grace of a woman
Not the grief of a child

And you learn
To build all your roads on today
Because tomorrow's ground is
Too uncertain for plans
And futures have a way
Of falling down in mid flight

After a while you learn
That even sunshine burns if you get too much
So you plant your own garden
And decorate your own soul
Instead of waiting
For someone to bring you flowers

And you learn
That you really can endure
That you are really strong
And you really do have worth
And you learn and you learn
With every good bye you learn.

Veronica A. Shoffstall

"I love people who make me laugh. I honestly think it's the thing I like most, to laugh. It cures a multitude of ills. It's probably the most important thing in a person."

— Audrey Hepburn

Baiz

I like it when guys get past the fugly pencil moustache stage from their adolescence, and move on to the next - shaved, rugged. Makes them look so much more sane.

Actually its more than just the moustache.
Stage One - Their sense of dressing, their VOICE, their attitude towards the female sex, their lameness. Haha, makes them what they are. I have loved growing up with these fools. They gave me my taste for lameness (I LOVE lame btw, brings a lot of joy once you enjoy it). Their innocence (though not in all areas, mind you) when dealing with things. Girls are slightly annoying that way. They also grew up faster like you and hence they know what you mean or what you are up to. These guys - simple, plain and right there.

All these things change one day.
Stage Two - I am still not sure if its over a period of time, or just overnight coz I have too many reasons to believe its overnight. They become men. They start to dress up, shave, talk normally and take responsibilities. They are suddenly more careful, CLEAN and neat.

Pigs (brother) is still in Stage One. I am missing being around him and watch him transform. Hopefully he'll join me at uni and let me be there for him.

And ALL these other fools. Some of them have moved on to Stage Two, while some others are still figuring Stage One out. You guys are fun, no matter what! Heres for every joke that was made, every mokkae that was put, every smile that was smiled, every hug that was given, and every word that was spoke.

Dunno why I feel so emo about my guy friends. Never mind, I still do. Lorries of love.

Window shopping

These past few days have been a pleasure to my eye. I have been going around with my mom and buying stuff for the coming up 4-month hitch in NUS. Somehow, I can view it as only that. I wonder if its unfortunately or not. It doesnt feel home-ish there, not close. Home also does not feel as home-ish as it used to be, but definitely better then NUS.

Getting back to the issue. I have always loved shopping, from what I can remember of it. From the times my parents picked up stuff for me till now. Buying what you buy is not so much the same as trying on stuff you can surely not afford. This applies especially in singapore malls with my student budget. Although I have to say, I am one of those people who gets extremely conscious of that store assistant who starts staring at you when you take clothes inside the change room. SO best option, ogle. Ogle all you want at those clothes. Helps me get into a cheerful mood. ALWAYS. If you dont have time for taking that bus to vivo, laptops are there to save you.

Its probably in fact that its new, I believe girls like new things. Whatever it maybe. Its probably that it looks great on that mannequin. Its probably the colours. Its probably the smell. Window shopping ftw.

How I found that pencil end.

It was a frustrating quiz monday. I wore my jacket and pushed a mechanical pencil in its pocket, just to have one handy. The dreadful quiz was over in an hour and I came back to my room in PGP to drop some things off before leaving for a meeting in YIH. And when I was walking back to the bus stop, near the foyer I heard this click sound. I looked around and realized I for got to remove my pencil form the jacket pocket. The bottom screw got off the pencil, and rolled off somewhere. I was already in a hurry so I took a swift glance around and told the screw I would be back to find him.

I came late in the night and suddenly near the foyer again I remembered what happened in the morning. I looked around, in a desperate attempt to find my screw. I knew it was impossible to locate a 1 cm long transparent thing. But I continued to wish for finding it. I was still looking everywhere walking as though in a trance, across the length of the foyer. I take the next step and guess what, I stamped on the screw! My mouth went into my biggest grin and with all the glee in the world I held my screw as I walked back to my room!

I LOVE it when stuff like this happens to me. Wanting some small thing SO badly, that the entire universe conspires to give it to you. It is true. That screw could have been stamped by a hundred people in the duration of 6-7 hours. It still decided to lie there and get under my foot. Brilliant. Its things like this that give me hope, lots of it -- That what I want from the bottom of my heart is always mine :)

Heres to hope and love.

The list

I have been meaning to make a list of things that make up me. Here goes:

Pizza
Cheese
Beach
Shoes
Blue
Slow mushy songs
Small green plants
Colourful bags
Stone studs
Junky jewellery
Mind reading
Magic - the real one, that paulo coehlo talks about
Stationery
Swings
Designing stuff
Ice lemon tea
Puzzles
Trees
Walking
Sponegbob Green - Ipod
Spongebob
Seksy daily planners
Yellow
See-saw
Pots
Briyani
Chicken
Structures
Peanut butter
Julia Roberts' smile
Roller coasters
Mr. Maccy Mac - Laptop
Photobooth
Dresses
Kurtis
Central Library, NUS
Chocolate bread
Anything chocolate
Pictures
Post-it
Staring out of a Window
Chennai
Drives
Dancing secretly
Bus rides @ NUS
YIH student lounge
Subway
Rajni
Coke
Logic
Flip-flops
Programming
Singing secretly
Letters
Making collage
Cooking dinner
Sleeping under the open sky
Clothes




PS: Updating forever.