"I love people who make me laugh. I honestly think it's the thing I like most, to laugh. It cures a multitude of ills. It's probably the most important thing in a person."

— Audrey Hepburn

JUDGING PEOPLE

See that boy doing his homework in homeroom? … He couldn’t do it last night because he was too busy talking his best friend out of suicide. See that girl, with her face caked in make up? … She’s bullied, she needs to feel beautiful. See him, the one who wears long sleeves everyday? … He covers his arms to hide the scars. See her, with the cheap, hand-me-down clothes? … Her family can’t afford food for half the month, let alone get brand names. See the girl who laughs and smiles at every little thing? … She cries herself to sleep every night. Wonder why she never lets her friends over her house? … Because she’s afraid they’ll see her dad passed out drunk on the floor, as always. See how that girl cringes as rape jokes? … She was raped. See the boy who everyone goes to for advice? … He wishes someone would do the same for him. See the girl who never brings a lunch? … She’s disgusted by her body. See her, with the little waist? … She goes to the bathroom and forces herself to throw up so that she can keep her waist that way. See the boy over there, see the dark circles under his eyes? … He has insomnia, he fears what he’ll see in his dreams. See that girl daydreaming over there? … She has schizophrenia. See the boy biting his nails? … He has cancer and he’s wondering how much time he has left. See your best friend? … She’s addicted to drugs, but she can’t tell you because you wont understand. See that boy reading all about 9/11? … His parents died on that day. See her, with her phone on her at all times? … She’s waiting for a call saying her sister was found after a kidnapping 4 years ago. Don’t judge.

I have judged people in the past. From this day on, I make a promise to self. I wont. Ever again.

Source: http://alonetilforever.tumblr.com/post/3992368091/osee-that-boy-doing-his-homework-in-homeroom-he

WHY cant lizards talk?

Last night, I was trying to put myself to sleep when something struck me.

This GRAND idea.

That could actually be a solution to all my nightmares. Why cant lizards talk? So, imagine if they could. All I need to do is hold a gentleman’s conversation with them and let them know that they are trespassing private property and that I could sue them for the same if they do not oblige to move out. That’s it. End to all the nights I wonder if that creepy ugly thing is poking its head from under that table, or from behind the tube light. And if they refuse to oblige, I could even report the damned lizard and get him to evacuate my house forcefully. These guys can even get lizard lawyers if they want. That way, we would have a proper and sensible argument and justice would be served.

YES. OMG.

God, grant me this much. Rather, grant the lizards this much. Let them talk.

Peace.

As an Indian Citizen

Singapore was preparing to vote for its leader. And it was my first time around rallies in another country. Not just any other country. It was one of the most developed economies in the world. I had always thought that the process was pretty much simple. There is one party that stands for the elections. And you pretty much don’t have a choice but to vote for them, given that they do a really good job. However, it was surprising to know that, this time the scene was changing a little bit. My Singaporean friends were attending rallies by different other parties (They actually exist!). I came across debates among my Singaporean peers, on whom they should vote for and why. At the same time, Tamil Nadu State election results were coming out. Newspapers and TV channels had new meat to chew on. Parents and relatives talked about it on the phone. At home. People in restaurants. Old men in the park. My grandma was talking about the scene for her bit. Analysis of which leader should come back. Who was going to win? Who had contributed anything at all for the community? Who had robbed more? Whose family was looting? So many questions were drifting in the air.


Two scenes. And I’d say from completely different movies.


Scene 1: One would think that Singapore having all that it does, would elect their ruling party. And yes they did. But all the debates that took place gave me a new perspective. There were people who were looking for change. They wanted less foreigners, better roads and drainage systems (They’ve GOT to be kidding me), speedier government procedures, etc. Nevertheless, what they wanted dint matter so much to me, as the fact that THEY ACTUALLY DID WANT MORE. There is always door for change, space for more. That’s what I learnt from those few weeks of exposure.


Scene 2: Tamil Nadu elections have always been this way. One party would take care of one small thing in their reign. Other would give attention to another small issue. They are united in one issue though, never failing to give attention to looting public money. It doesn’t matter to me which party comes to power.


Digitally printed banners of party leaders’ blown-up faces with head shots of the guys who made the posters, carrying slogans that claim these leaders to own the state (I should give it to them, they are very honest people) – are ALWAYS going to be around, destroying the beauty of the city. I remember once, the government decided to ban the huge advertisement banners around the city. Wonder what category these fall under. And every time they take a certain route in the city, the roads are going to be adorned with their faces and flags. Flags which are stuck inside holes bored on the granite walkway. Oh yes, new holes every time they decide to stick flags on the roads. We kinda know who we voted for and who the ruling party is. I wish they realized that, and dint try to remind us every single day. What happened to beautifying Chennai, keeping it clean? One party would decide to waste hundreds of crores and build a new assembly building. And the other party, would decide to move back to the old one, spending even more crores and wasting more public money in the end. These are just starters. Very petty issues. There’s agriculture getting less importance by the day, city getting crowded, land prices, corruption, unemployment, theft, road discipline, accidents, what not. It hurts to know that these parties don’t give a damn to these issues. Issues which will, when addressed, probably give them more recognition. Ignorance is not just by the parties, even the public care less for issues that matter. They would go by number/values of freebies or even worse by religion and caste. Yes, we are a religious nation. I am pretty sure that never meant vote for the guy who is from your sect of belief. Hurts.


Comparing these two scenes. Oh yes, the second one is my own perspective and the first is borrowed hence the difference in size! I pray and hope for the day my countrymen would start demanding for a better government. It is not at all the fault of the parties. It is the attitude of every citizen that matters. Singapore is a hardworking nation. Yes, I have complained of monotonous life a million times, these past months. But they are people who know their duties. They form a responsible nation. They care for their government. Government cares for them. They are selfish yes, but selfish for their nation. That counts. That is the quality we lack. We do not know our duties. We rarely work hard. We cannot care more for the government. Government cannot care for us. We are selfish people, but our selfishness stops with self and family. The day we extend it to nation we would succeed. The saying for cleanliness comes to my mind now, ‘Keep yourself clean, keep your house clean, and keep your road clean. And if every citizen did the same thing the entire nation would be clean’- Can be applied to any situation/issue.


Overwhelming emotions due to boredom at so-called work. ‘True’ overwhelming emotions though.

Karma. again.

Hahaha, I love karma jokes. Guess because I believe in it TOO much. 

Live it like it is

I was having a bad day until now. Actually I'll say HORRIBLE day. I am sitting in my room after my semesters. It was a bad paper. I can say without exaggeration that it was the worst paper I have taken in these two years in university.

I was cribbing about that to a couple of friends and feeling disappointed with myself till I decided to stumbleupon. And I saw this..



I remembered how I was talking about graduating a few days back.


Bad exams will pass. Come again (I am sure) and pass.
Meanwhile, I'll hold on and live. Right through. :)

Hahahahah. Karma.

“A girl should be two things: classy and fabulous.”
Coco Chanel 

Pretty Girls

I like looking at pretty existence in any form.
Girls even more.
Its so pleasant to look at a girl so fair.

www.seecreatures.com

Baiz

I like it when guys get past the fugly pencil moustache stage from their adolescence, and move on to the next - shaved, rugged. Makes them look so much more sane.

Actually its more than just the moustache.
Stage One - Their sense of dressing, their VOICE, their attitude towards the female sex, their lameness. Haha, makes them what they are. I have loved growing up with these fools. They gave me my taste for lameness (I LOVE lame btw, brings a lot of joy once you enjoy it). Their innocence (though not in all areas, mind you) when dealing with things. Girls are slightly annoying that way. They also grew up faster like you and hence they know what you mean or what you are up to. These guys - simple, plain and right there.

All these things change one day.
Stage Two - I am still not sure if its over a period of time, or just overnight coz I have too many reasons to believe its overnight. They become men. They start to dress up, shave, talk normally and take responsibilities. They are suddenly more careful, CLEAN and neat.

Pigs (brother) is still in Stage One. I am missing being around him and watch him transform. Hopefully he'll join me at uni and let me be there for him.

And ALL these other fools. Some of them have moved on to Stage Two, while some others are still figuring Stage One out. You guys are fun, no matter what! Heres for every joke that was made, every mokkae that was put, every smile that was smiled, every hug that was given, and every word that was spoke.

Dunno why I feel so emo about my guy friends. Never mind, I still do. Lorries of love.

Hijab

I had this conversation with a friend sometime back. We argued about the hijab but did not spend much time on it.

Today, she sent me a video.



I have had this conversation with amma before, during those times we discuss whether I can wear revealing clothes. I always thought it was my right to do so. I want, so I do. She made me think. She asked me why I want to wear them. Am I in show business? Clearly not. Why else do I want to wear it? Is it for the sake of others? Do I care about what they think of me?

No, I do not care for what others think of my dressing. I need to look bright and colourful. Its for my own satisfaction. That being the criteria, why should it be revealing? Maybe I do not care whether its revealing. Maybe its just because I like the way that dress fits me, maybe the colour and there could be a million other reasons. What worried me is the fact that subconsciously I might be deciding on what I have seen others in; on what I thought looked good on others. And yes, that is true. Doesnt that include public opinion. Am I not in some twisted way caring about what others think of my dressing.

In trying to answer these questions, I also realized the presence of hijab. The hijab is a symbol that defies things the world seems to be working towards. Women, fashion, cosmetics, magazines, models. They all seem to vanish in front of a woman who wears her hijab. I am my own, why do I have to exhibit myself to the world. In my opinion, wearing a hijab is just a symbol of the way you think. Its a symbol of self-respect.

When I argue inside, I have come up with two contradictory theories. Haven't we assumed men to be forcing the women into hijabs? Nevertheless, isn't this a male-dominated world which is striving to get you out of it? Debatable.

Some might wear it for religion and some might wear out of situation. I am unable to think of a rational situation where I might have to wear a hijab. However, if that does happens, I know I will be ready to wear one. Till then, I salute the women around the world who've had the courage to take this step. You are my inspiration.

Window shopping

These past few days have been a pleasure to my eye. I have been going around with my mom and buying stuff for the coming up 4-month hitch in NUS. Somehow, I can view it as only that. I wonder if its unfortunately or not. It doesnt feel home-ish there, not close. Home also does not feel as home-ish as it used to be, but definitely better then NUS.

Getting back to the issue. I have always loved shopping, from what I can remember of it. From the times my parents picked up stuff for me till now. Buying what you buy is not so much the same as trying on stuff you can surely not afford. This applies especially in singapore malls with my student budget. Although I have to say, I am one of those people who gets extremely conscious of that store assistant who starts staring at you when you take clothes inside the change room. SO best option, ogle. Ogle all you want at those clothes. Helps me get into a cheerful mood. ALWAYS. If you dont have time for taking that bus to vivo, laptops are there to save you.

Its probably in fact that its new, I believe girls like new things. Whatever it maybe. Its probably that it looks great on that mannequin. Its probably the colours. Its probably the smell. Window shopping ftw.

Rush

Science Expo

-- is a tradition that takes place in my High school. Once in every two years we would have exhibitions of anything and everything you can think of pertaining to science. All the students, science ones mainly would come together and display exhibits and models of real-life phenomena. Being the nerd that I once was, I was always part of this expo right from class 3 till 11. I used to love those two days. Science expo means -- talking about your model for two whole days, lots of junk food and running around with your girlfriends visiting other friends-their models.

Only in the last science expo I participated, did it mean one more thing. All those years, there used to be chief guests who came for the expo. A typical chief guest would be from one of the science and technology institutions in the city. They would walk around one or two floors, omit the two others and leave. Technically they were the highlights of the day, but never in reality.

Our chief guest for the last year was Dr.APJ Abdul Kalam. My correspondent is a lady with a lot of connections. And she got him to visit our expo that year. I was never a fan of rocket science. I was never a fan of Dr. Kalam. Yet something in me jumped with joy at the thought of getting to see him up and close. He visited the exhibitions and then proceeded to the auditorium to talk to us for a short discourse. We were all gathered in the auditorium, waiting for him to come. He walked up on stage and everyone was jumping to take a look. And when I could finally spot him, I was overcome with emotion. I still don't understand why. It could have been that he was an ex-president or that he was a man of achievement or that I have never seen anyone so important in my entire life. He spoke about life and education, he spoke about 'happy'ness and success. Completely inspiring thoughts. He left in less than half an hour, but I stayed with that impact for a day or two. Unforgettable.

Musings

What if this rain cloud that poses such a threat
is really just a part of You that you haven't met?

From 'What If' by Kirtana.

How I found that pencil end.

It was a frustrating quiz monday. I wore my jacket and pushed a mechanical pencil in its pocket, just to have one handy. The dreadful quiz was over in an hour and I came back to my room in PGP to drop some things off before leaving for a meeting in YIH. And when I was walking back to the bus stop, near the foyer I heard this click sound. I looked around and realized I for got to remove my pencil form the jacket pocket. The bottom screw got off the pencil, and rolled off somewhere. I was already in a hurry so I took a swift glance around and told the screw I would be back to find him.

I came late in the night and suddenly near the foyer again I remembered what happened in the morning. I looked around, in a desperate attempt to find my screw. I knew it was impossible to locate a 1 cm long transparent thing. But I continued to wish for finding it. I was still looking everywhere walking as though in a trance, across the length of the foyer. I take the next step and guess what, I stamped on the screw! My mouth went into my biggest grin and with all the glee in the world I held my screw as I walked back to my room!

I LOVE it when stuff like this happens to me. Wanting some small thing SO badly, that the entire universe conspires to give it to you. It is true. That screw could have been stamped by a hundred people in the duration of 6-7 hours. It still decided to lie there and get under my foot. Brilliant. Its things like this that give me hope, lots of it -- That what I want from the bottom of my heart is always mine :)

Heres to hope and love.

So true

“When god wants to drive a person insane, he grants that persons every wish.”

- The Valkyries, Paulo Coelho

The gender of numbers

I have always associated numbers with Gender! Haha, many whom I confessed to found this creepy and weird. But I have, and still do. I cant even remember when it started. Just a few days back, I was telling some friends so and they asked me if I was dyslexic! :O

I am pretty sure I am not. Anyway, I decided to google this phenomenon -- to see if it was common with people or to confirm my doubt of being an alien. Thankfully, it IS common. Quite a number of people have made this confession on blogs. I guess I am human after all. :)

Here goes the list:

1 -- A young smart boy.
2 -- A cute little girl.
3 -- A woman of 35.
4 -- A man of 40.
5 -- A old man.
6 -- A woman of 45.
7 -- A handsome guy.
8 -- A mother.
9 -- A beautiful girl.
10 -- A father.

Not too nice

 “A person who is nice to you but rude to the waiter, or to others, is not a nice person” (Barry, 1999, p.177).


“Watch out for people who have a situational value system, who can turn the charm on and off depending on the status of the person they are interacting with…Be especially wary of those who are rude to people perceived to be in subordinate roles.” (Bill Swanson, former CEO Raytheon)


Very situational, right now. How I wish some people got this and judge. 

I dont like Waterfalls

Do I like WaterFalls?

I have contemplated over this question whenever I see one. I haven't been to the greatest Waterfalls in the world. Just seen small ones in parts of India. I have seen pictures though, loads of them. Of a lot of waterfalls in the world. And every time I see one, I cringe and go, 'Yeah sure'. I find them fake and ugly. Like wanna-bes you spot everyday. To me they pretend to be a natural 'beauty', unconvincingly so.

I dont like Waterfalls. Weird.

Hi, Dhanya, Civil Engineer. Yeh.

I was reading Libba Bray's blog today. And her latest post is in reply to a readers doubt, whether to go with her passion and study art or to go with her dads wishes and become a English Teacher. And then I remembered how I went through the same phase last year, AFTER completing a year at the university.

I came to NUS as a common engg student. Pretty good option for a fickle-minded bitch like me. I read every branch's subject. And this is what I realize one night at the end of second sem. That I CANT sit with engg for another three years. I spoke to my parents that second and convinced them of my intentions. My parents are very accommodating people. They have their principles, but when I want to break them they dont stop me. And so they agreed. I applied for change of faculty to School of Design and Environment. This was followed by research on the Arch programme here. I spoke to every person I knew, who could help me out with my decision. There was a night of confessions and loads of crying in between (lol), which was partly woven with some other trouble. I realized I had to spend another 5 years studying here. I thought about the money involved with something like that. And at the end of all the drama, I had made my decision.

I am a Civil Engineering student.

Even now there are times I wonder what would have happened if I chose to go with the change. For some back-story here, I applied for Architecture courses even before NUS happened, at home. I was always and is still passionate about design. Only, I decided to accept engineering. It is probably my destiny (Excuses, baby). I know my passion. I know I will go back to pursuing it for a serious career. I also know that I enjoy math, and sitting in engg classrooms for 4 years will change the way I think. And to that I am grateful.

Maybe it would have been cooler to tell people that I am an architect. 'I am a designer' will definitely sound cooler than that. Until then, I am just going to have to make Civil Engineering sound cooler. ;)

PS: Read the Yeh in title as Yes without the 's'. Get it? Yeh.