Saturday, 18 July 2015

Fear & decisions

A really wise stranger (well, I guess I can say friend) said this when I was looking for relationship advice:

look for fear

the fear of being left behind, or alone, or missing someone

the fear of being trapped, of giving up freedom, of losing choices

different fears are hard to conjoin, but are worth talking about

What is the basis of your decision? What kind of fear? 

Before you reject this idea, think about it. 

Fear of failure motivates most of us to keep plugging away. Fear of loneliness, having experienced it, makes us choose the people we want to share time with. Fear of loss keeps some parents from letting their children go too far. Fear of rape plays a huge role in the kind of jobs women choose, in many parts of the world. Singapore is a nation that has built excellent safety standards for civilians based on fear driven law. 

And then there is the other side. 

Fearless want of success provides the same. Fearless love is the foundation of healthy relationships. Fearless parents teach confidence to their kids. Fearless career decisions take women to amazing heights. Maybe Japan is an example of a nation that has amazing safety standards for its civilians because people just keep at their purpose in life. (I need validation on this assumption about Japan!)

So what do you pick? Fear? Fearless? 

Both work well! But consciously find what works for you! 

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