Monday, 3 December 2012

#2 - Mother

I am her. Simply put. 

Mom is always the example to follow and copy. Her habits are mine. I remember going to bed with a book because she would do so. I do so many things today because she taught me to. She is talking parent. She talks through things. She does not hide and seal. I got my candor from her. She is tenacious and committed. She lives for punctuality. She taught me the importance of independence. There have been times when I wondered why she did not come and collect me, instead let me pick myself up. Now I know. She is the Indian version of a proper english mother with her prim habits. 

There was a brief portion in our relationship, when I was not fond of her. My despicable early teenage years when I was atrocious and mostly disagreeable. I would argue with her many times. I have even said mean things. I don't want to apologize for what I was, but I want to apologize for hurting you. 

Those days are thankfully in the past now. I am glad we fight very little these days if not at all. We both are rebels that way. 

I surprise myself when I jump at buying a pretty glass bowl for my cutlery collection, when I deride beauty parlours, when I support natural ways of health and healing, when I prefer a walk to a gym workout, when I enjoy gossiping, when I imitate people, when I displace things in the name of cleaning the house, when I have to have a shower first thing in the morning for a day to be productive, when I can't wear anything that looks dirty, when I condemn (really) young girls with boyfriends and when I fly off the hook for the silliest of things. 

I miss warm silly fights and everything to do with you. I miss hugging you tight and getting lost in it. I miss your food. I miss our random movie sessions. 

You are everything amma.

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